Worms and Butterflies

Even though this was a weekday, I was home from the day job, sick (the day I wrote this article). The doc says I'm contagious with a virus. So after my doctor's visit, as I pulled into my driveway on a nice quiet morning (I rarely see these as I'm always at the day job), I was greeted by several beautiful butterflies and dragon flies flitting all about my garden and driveway. The dragon flies love to perch on the car antennas. Beats me why but they sure are gorgoeus. Anyway, they got me to thinking, sometimes a dangerous thing in my case. Everybody loves butterflies, at least everybody I've ever met. They're more than beautiful, they're ethereal. Their metamorphosis from the wormy creature pictured below to butterfly is absolutely amazing, not unlike many of us: writers, children, students... I could go on. I'd like to think I'm a butterfly in writer terms. I know I was once a worm (no, not the sleazy or insect variety) or a better term would be newbie or perhaps beginning writer. I've not hit the big time yet, at least not the New York Times bestseller lists or even have dead tree books lining Walmart racks (sometimes Borders and Waldens), so that puts me somewhere in the middle of the spectrum I imagine. Before the butterflies have metamorphosed into their beautiful selves, I've heard many people, primarily my kids and coworkers, complain about all the ugly worms and cocoons all over the trees. I know I'm not the only one who knows what butterflies look like before they go through their amazing change, so why are so many people impatient for the change to take place? Why do they complain about this initial stages in the development of this beautiful creature? Or is it that they honestly forget that good things take time? Babies don't come out of the womb walking and talking. Butterflies don't enter the world as beautiful winged creatures. Writers (the vast majority) don't hit the best seller lists with their first book and usually not their second or third. Good things take time. Good things are worth the wait. If I relate this back to being a writer again, even the most accomplished writer doesn't write a book and come out with a perfect first draft. She needs to edit and polish that story so it can turn into a beautiful butterfly. In today's fast food world, we're into instant gratification. We drive up to McDonald's window and expect to get a hot hamburger in two minutes. We purchase - and get - books and games online any time of day or night - instantly. We're able to shop for groceries in the middle of the night, every night. Hey, I'm not against this. I'm as guilty as the next guy. I often need to remind myself to be patient with myself and with others. We need to remember that beautiful butterflies aren't created in a day. We need to remember to nurture our gardens so we can nurture our butterflies. In case you missed my news yesterday, August 18th, one of my butterflies was just set free at Total-e-Bound.com. It's a new BDSM novel primarily M/F but there are a couple of M/M and M/M/F scenes. Blurb Stacey disguises herself to fool her ex-husband, the Internet king of porn, but he's not the only one who gets a shock. Stacey Cooke can't believe her eyes when she sees her ex-husband Brand on the Internet—and he's the new king of porn. She divorced him for being too boring in bed and out and so she's stunned. Much worse than stunned, she's jealous and it hurts. She wonders if she gave up on him too early. She can't stop peeking at her ex with all his film partners. When an ad pops up for a new partner to have sex with Brand on film, her friend Lilli persuades her to apply. Donning a mask, disguising her voice, Stacey decides to see if she's still in love with him. Excerpt from: Submissive Dreams

“You’re not gonna fuckin’ believe this.” Lilli whistled long and loud while she shook her head. The late afternoon sunlight filtering through the grimy windows glinted off her multi-coloured hair streaked blonde and red through her auburn locks.

Accustomed to her friend’s over-ebullience, Stacey Cooke gave an obligatory smile. However, she didn’t blink an eye. “Uh huh.”

“No, I mean it. This is fuckin’ unbelievable! Sit down. This is wild.”

With an arched brow, Stacey double checked her seating arrangement. “I am sitting. So what is it I won’t believe?”

Reverently, Lilli placed her laptop atop Stacey’s legs. “Look closely. Recognise anyone?”

Stacey gulped. Naked bodies writhed together, kissing, caressing, shagging their arses off… Women were tied up while men enjoyed their wicked way with them.

“Uh, why do you want me to look at this?” Despite herself, she couldn’t stop staring at the huge hard cocks fucking the moist pussies. Nor could she keep from creaming her own panties.

“Come on. Don’t you see it?” Lilli jumped up and down as if panicked. She jabbed a finger at the screen.

“Look at the man’s face. Don’t you recognise him?” Her friend’s voice reverberated with frustration and excitement.

Stacey hadn’t exactly been studying faces. Those muscles and cocks were mouth-watering scrumptious, and she squirmed on her chair.

Lilli tapped her pointy, chipped fingernail on a man’s face

Stacey’s eyes dilated on the face she knew so well. It went blurry before her eyes, and her heart skipped several beats. She couldn’t breathe. It couldn’t be. She had to be hallucinating. Or this was a trick. Was it April first?

“That’s Brandon.”

The caption under the bald-headed man proclaimed him to be ‘Tyrannosaurus Rex’, but it was unmistakably her ex-husband—on steroids. Or maybe some great graphic air brushing was in play. Still, she laboured in disbelief as she struggled for air. “Th-that couldn’t be him. He’d never, ever…”

Gobsmacked, she couldn’t finish the sentence.

Lilli leaned close enough to kiss the screen. “Dominate women? Tie them up? Shag them in public? Be a porn star?”

All of the above. Stacey couldn’t help herself, she stole another look at the man’s face. It certainly looked like Brand, but she couldn’t wrap her mind around all this. Hell no! Her husband couldn’t be fucking other women. Especially not so many other women—where everybody could see him. “They say everyone has a double…”

“If it was me, I’d be finding out for sure.” Lilli waved a dismissive hand and paced before her.

The hurtful truth slapped her between the eyes, and she dragged in a deep breath.

“We’re divorced. He can do whatever the hell he pleases.” Even if it ached that he’d never done any of that with her, that he was doing it with so many other women, she’d get over it. Still, obsessed against her will, she scrolled through the pages, counting just how many partners he’d had. Holy! ‘Rex’ had fucked at least twenty women onscreen. The man was more machine than human. vShe mumbled more to herself than to her friend as she rested her chin on her hand, her spirit draining. “Just how would I find out for sure?”

Lilli crossed back to her and gave her shoulder a commiserative squeeze. “Well, you could pick up the phone and just ask him.” v“Lovely. You expect me to blurt out ‘are you a porn star? Is that you shagging all those twits?’ Like I’m really bloody going to do that.”

Lilli confiscated the laptop and clicked on a few keys. Then she handed it back as she licked her lips. “Look, they’re advertising for women who want to…participate.”

“You’re not suggesting…?” Stacey gaped at her friend. “Why would I want to? We’re divorced with a capitol ‘D’.” Pain slashed at her nevertheless—a pain she didn’t want and refused to name. “I mean, he never wanted me that way. Our sex was mind-numbing…”

She shut up when she realised she’d revealed more than she’d intended. Flames licked her cheeks. Lilli leaned over her, crimson heat flooding her cheeks. “You call that boring? If he wasn’t your ex, I might be tempted…”

Available at: Total-e-Bound.com

Don't worry, some instant gratification is excellent. :)

Even though it's a weekday, I'm home from the day job, sick. The doc says I'm contagious with a virus. So after my doctor's visit, as I pulled into my driveway on a nice quiet morning (I rarely see these as I'm always at the day job), I was greeted by several beautiful butterflies and dragon flies flitting all about my garden and driveway. The dragon flies love to perch on the car antennas. Beats me why but they sure are gorgoeus. Anyway, they got me to thinking, sometimes a dangerous thing in my case. Everybody loves butterflies, at least everybody I've ever met. They're more than beautiful, they're ethereal. Their metamorphosis from the wormy creature pictured below to butterfly is absolutely amazing, not unlike many of us: writers, children, students... I could go on. I'd like to think I'm a butterfly in writer terms. I know I was once a worm (no, not the sleazy or insect variety) or a better term would be newbie or perhaps beginning writer. I've not hit the big time yet, at least not the New York Times bestseller lists or even have dead tree books lining Wal-Mart racks (sometimes Borders and Waldens), so that puts me somewhere in the middle of the spectrum I imagine. Before the butterflies have metamorphosed into their beautiful selves, I've heard many people, primarily my kids and coworkers, complain about all the ugly worms and cocoons all over the trees. I know I'm not the only one who knows what butterflies look like before they go through their amazing change, so why are so many people impatient for the change to take place? Why do they complain about this initial stages in the development of this beautiful creature? Or is it that they honestly forget that good things take time? Babies don't come out of the womb walking and talking. Butterflies don't enter the world as beautiful winged creatures. Writers (the vast majority) don't hit the best seller lists with their first book and usually not their second or third. Good things take time. Good things are worth the wait. If I relate this back to being a writer again, even the most accomplished writer doesn't write a book and come out with a perfect first draft. She needs to edit and polish that story so it can turn into a beautiful butterfly. In today's fast food world, we're into instant gratification. We drive up to McDonald's window and expect to get a hot hamburger in two minutes. We purchase - and get - books and games online any time of day or night - instantly. We're able to shop for groceries in the middle of the night, every night. Hey, I'm not against this. I'm as guilty as the next guy. I often need to remind myself to be patient with myself and with others. We need to remember that beautiful butterflies aren't created in a day. We need to remember to nurture our gardens so we can nurture our butterflies. This coming Monday, August 18th, one of my butterflies will be set free at Total-e-Bound.com. It's a new BDSM novel primarily M/F but there are a couple of M/M and M/M/F scenes. Blurb Stacey disguises herself to fool her ex-husband, the Internet king of porn, but he's not the only one who gets a shock. Stacey Cooke can't believe her eyes when she sees her ex-husband Brand on the Internet—and he's the new king of porn. She divorced him for being too boring in bed and out and so she's stunned. Much worse than stunned, she's jealous and it hurts. She wonders if she gave up on him too early. She can't stop peeking at her ex with all his film partners. When an ad pops up for a new partner to have sex with Brand on film, her friend Lilli persuades her to apply. Donning a mask, disguising her voice, Stacey decides to see if she's still in love with him. Excerpt from: Submissive Dreams

"You're not gonna fuckin' believe this." Lilli whistled long and loud while she shook her head. The late afternoon sunlight filtering through the grimy windows glinted off her multi-coloured hair streaked blonde and red through her auburn locks.

Accustomed to her friend's over-ebullience, Stacey Cooke gave an obligatory smile. However, she didn't blink an eye. "Uh huh."

"No, I mean it. This is fuckin' unbelievable! Sit down. This is wild."

With an arched brow, Stacey double checked her seating arrangement. "I am sitting. So what is it I won't believe?"

Reverently, Lilli placed her laptop atop Stacey's legs. "Look closely. Recognise anyone?"

Stacey gulped. Naked bodies writhed together, kissing, caressing, shagging their arses off… Women were tied up while men enjoyed their wicked way with them.

"Uh, why do you want me to look at this?" Despite herself, she couldn't stop staring at the huge hard cocks fucking the moist pussies. Nor could she keep from creaming her own panties.

"Come on. Don't you see it?" Lilli jumped up and down as if panicked. She jabbed a finger at the screen.

"Look at the man's face. Don't you recognise him?" Her friend's voice reverberated with frustration and excitement.

Stacey hadn't exactly been studying faces. Those muscles and cocks were mouth-watering scrumptious, and she squirmed on her chair.

Lilli tapped her pointy, chipped fingernail on a man's face

Stacey's eyes dilated on the face she knew so well. It went blurry before her eyes, and her heart skipped several beats. She couldn't breathe. It couldn't be. She had to be hallucinating. Or this was a trick. Was it April first?

"That's Brandon."

The caption under the bald-headed man proclaimed him to be 'Tyrannosaurus Rex', but it was unmistakably her ex-husband—on steroids. Or maybe some great graphic air brushing was in play. Still, she laboured in disbelief as she struggled for air. "Th-that couldn't be him. He'd never, ever…"

Gobsmacked, she couldn't finish the sentence.

Lilli leaned close enough to kiss the screen. "Dominate women? Tie them up? Shag them in public? Be a porn star?"

All of the above. Stacey couldn't help herself, she stole another look at the man's face. It certainly looked like Brand, but she couldn't wrap her mind around all this. Hell no! Her husband couldn't be fucking other women. Especially not so many other women—where everybody could see him. "They say everyone has a double…"

"If it was me, I'd be finding out for sure." Lilli waved a dismissive hand and paced before her.

The hurtful truth slapped her between the eyes, and she dragged in a deep breath.

"We're divorced. He can do whatever the hell he pleases." Even if it ached that he'd never done any of that with her, that he was doing it with so many other women, she'd get over it. Still, obsessed against her will, she scrolled through the pages, counting just how many partners he'd had. Holy! 'Rex' had fucked at least twenty women onscreen. The man was more machine than human. vShe mumbled more to herself than to her friend as she rested her chin on her hand, her spirit draining. "Just how would I find out for sure?"

Lilli crossed back to her and gave her shoulder a commiserative squeeze. "Well, you could pick up the phone and just ask him." v"Lovely. You expect me to blurt out 'are you a porn star? Is that you shagging all those twits?' Like I'm really bloody going to do that."

Lilli confiscated the laptop and clicked on a few keys. Then she handed it back as she licked her lips. "Look, they're advertising for women who want to…participate."

"You're not suggesting…?" Stacey gaped at her friend. "Why would I want to? We're divorced with a capitol 'D'." Pain slashed at her nevertheless—a pain she didn't want and refused to name. "I mean, he never wanted me that way. Our sex was mind-numbing…"

She shut up when she realised she'd revealed more than she'd intended. Flames licked her cheeks. Lilli leaned over her, crimson heat flooding her cheeks. "You call that boring? If he wasn't your ex, I might be tempted…"

Available at: Total-e-Bound.com

Don't worry, some instant gratification is excellent. :)

You'll also want to see what Amarinda Jones, Anika Hamilton, Anny Cook, Barbara Huffert, Brynn Paulin, Bronwyn Green, Dakota Rebel, Kelly Kirch, Molly Daniels, and Sandra Cox are up to, so make sure to visit them also. :)