Sunday, June 01, 2008

Life sucks

I just read a post from a friend - maybe she's more of a friend of a friend. She's down and I sympathize with her - rejection sucks and yes, published authors still get them. We get the formal rejections from publishers. And we get rejections from people we thought were good friends. I think those are the worst. No, I know they are. So it's my turn to have the pity party. I had a great critique partner. Morever, by far, she was a great friend. We were like sisters. At least I thought so. Now, I hardly hear from her. I mean hardly ever. Anyway, I went to the other person's blog and in the comments (by the way, my old friend hasn't commented here in almost forever so I doubt she visits here any more than she's been emailing or IMing me) was a very touching comment from our mutual friend. The mutual friend stated something like, we love you and the other 2/3rds of the 3 musketeers are always here for you. She also mentioned that the other 2 musketeers would help her with her book as they always do. Huh? They had said I would be part of their critique group when they started back up. They never informed me, although I suspected. I'm not the other 1/3. I know I'm not. I've been cut out. It feels like I've lost the friend. At least we're not close anymore. She's replaced me totally. I'm history. I was going to leave a nice comment myself offering hugs. I guess I should, but it hurts. I don't blame her. I guess I can't blame anyone but fate. Maybe myself? I guess I got too busy. I work a day job so I can't be online and available nearly as much as the others. And/or maybe they don't like the way I write or critique or whatever. Tears are stinging my eyes and I feel like an idiot in so many ways. One, I shouldn't let this get to me. Obviously I knew this already as I never hear from her. I could have emailed but I've seen this for a year or so and have felt so very left out and hurt, I backed away even further rather than chase after her like a fool. Shit happens. Life happens. Some friends are only meant for a season. Let me move on. She has. Oh well...

6 comments:

Sandra Cox said...

I'm sorry, Ash. I know that hurts.

LynTaylor said...

Sorry to hear this Ashley. Sounds a bit underhanded to me. Still, I guess we live and learn. Heart-wrenching for you but probably all for the best. Who wants to be pulled down by people like that anyway?

(((hugs)))

Kati said...

Awww Ashley!!! That sucks!!!! Sorry to hear that somebody you felt was a good friend has dumped you so carelessly and cruelly. I hope she realizes her mistake in time to salvage the friendship. In the mean time, I hope you can find somebody else less fickle to help critique your stories.

Amarinda Jones said...

I agree with Lyn. And you're right - move on - rise above it all. As my mother would say "They are beneath you." True friends never dump true friends....and fuck 'em

Trixie said...

Awww Ash, I'm really sorry you are hurting over this. As you said, friend for season (or reason) and not life. It's a shame, but where one door closes, another will open. xxx

Molly Daniels said...

Ditto to the above. Wish I could see you this week and give you a huge hug. You didn't deserve to be dropped like that.

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