Sunday, February 08, 2009

It's time to pull the plug when

I, Ashley Ladd, being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead politicians who couldn't pass ninth grade biology if their lives depended on it, or lawyers/doctors interested in simply running up the bills. If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least one of the following: Chinese Take-Out

Sex Chocolate

Diet Cola

Skyline Chili Spaghetti Sex Mexican Food Chocolate

Shrimp

Lobster Sex Chocolate French fries Chocolate Pizza Sex Ice cream Diet Cola Chocolate Chocolate Sex Chocolate It should be presumed that I won't ever get better. When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes, let the 'fat lady sing,' and call it a day!

Update on Uncle Bill: He had a bad night and so went to the doctor yesterday morning which canceled our visit. Thankfully, however, he only bruised his ribs, not broke them. According to both my dad and Uncle Bill, bruised ribs still hurt like hell.

Have a Drink IT'S 5 O'CLOCK SOMEWHERE

4 comments:

Regina Carlysle said...

This is so funny Ash! And you are absolutely right not to trust your fate to some of the knuckleheads out there.

Molly Daniels said...

Glad your uncle is better!

And this is too funny:)

Nixy Valentine said...

I couldn't agree more! I think I'll print this out, take it to my solicitor and have it added to my will.

Sandra Cox said...

Love your living will:)
Glad your uncle went to the doctor, hope you get to visit soon.

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