Is your family jealous of your writing?

Today, my younger daughter got angry at me for writing, for not spending quality time with her.

She's upset with me for spending too much time writing and writing related activities. She's tired of me spending time on the computer and talking about books and my writing.

I'm stressed. I need to spend quality time with my family. I also need to finish a cover art request form, a revision, and interviews. Plus we depend on the extra income I earn from writing so I need to spend some time writing.

My husband just bought "2012" and popped it into the TV for a riveting Saturday night. The main character of the movie, John Cusak who plays Jackson Curtis, is separated from his wife and family. Why? Because they were tired of him ignoring them while he wrote his book.

I asked my daughter what she wanted to do and she couldn't give me an answer. All she can voice is that she wants my attention away from the computer and books.

Does your family express similar feelings?

Recent posts you might like to read:

Rejection: Where Do You Go Next?

Procrastination

Cliche or Coincidence?

What Prompts Me To "Follow" A Blog

Make Sure Pretentious Words Don't Turn Off Your Readers

Dedicating Books

You'll also want to see what Amarinda Jones, Anika Hamilton, Anny Cook, Barbara Huffert, Brynn Paulin, Bronwyn Green, Dakota Rebel, Kelly Kirch, Molly Daniels, Sandra Cox, Regina Carlysle, and Cindy Spencer Pape are up to, so make sure to visit them also. :)

Please don't scare me

I don't have my Paint Shop Pro or Adobe Acrobat available at the moment or I'd lable this pic "Please don't scare me." Cute little guy, isn't he? This was taken after an earthquake in China.

He reminds me of my younger daughter, newly graduated from high school, 18 years-old, but not yet ready to be an adult.

She's excited and happy to be out of school, and yet, she's not. She's scared of the big world and possible earthquakes.

Above are both my daughters, 25 and 18, M and S. The 25 year-old isn't quite sure what she wants to be yet when she grows up, either.

Heck, sometimes I feel that way.

I always wanted to be a writer. Along the way I was also an accountant, cost-pricing analyst, soldier ("Airman" since I was in the Air Force), waitress, hostess, cashier, and finally a customer service rep and manager. I took Accounting in college so I never dreamed my path would wind up in customer service but it's right for me. And writing.

Sometimes I still have doubts if I've chosen the right paths, if working two jobs, meeting book deadlines, and promoting my books is what I still want to do. Stress is wearing on me. I know it is when I feel like I'm the panda pictured above, backing away and a little scared.

Last night I thought about stopping, but I couldn't find anything else I'd rather do to fill my time. I like to learn new things. I thrive on multi-tasking and creating new things. I have characters running around in my head that would drive me crazy if I didn't let them out.

It's time for a vacation and a change of scenery, but not to give up my dreams and goals.

I wish I could renew myself at Lori Foster's readers and writers get together in Cincinnati this weekend, but I can't get away right now. I don't have the financial wherewithal to even splurge on a movie.

But I need to find ways to relax and fill my well.

How do you renew your spirit?

How do you keep going when you can't get away from work much less travel to distant, exciting places?

A trip to the swimming pool at the gym sounds refreshing, but that will have to wait for another night. I have to take the graduate to softball practice at the park this evening.

Boy, do I need one of these!

Boy, but do I ever need one of these today! That guy has the right idea. Right now, I'm so tensed up, so infuriated, I could scream. Literally. Ugh!!! I hate it when I get this way. I haven't in a really long time. Maybe my stress is up because my immune system is down. I'm fighting a bacterial bronchitis at the moment and so have been home from the day job for two days now, in bed, with only the TV, my laptop, and my family to keep me company. You'd think that'd bring DOWN my stress level. After all, I've not had to deal with a cranky, bitchy customer in more than two days. Unfortunately, being bored, I've had more time to blog hop and surf around online than normal - have laptop, will travel, even when flat on my back sick in bed. I made the big mistake of checking out a message board I've not been to in awhile, one dealing with an ex-employer of sorts, one that always incites me. Having more time than usual, I spent more time there than ordinary. Then I ended up on You Tube watching some videos stating their opinion of this organization. Now, I happen to share most of the video makers' opinions. It was the opposition replying that got me riled up. My fault, I know, for letting it. My fault for reading it in the first place. My fault for not totally dropping it like I keep swearing to do. I understand that people on both sides have a right to express their views. I understand that when people feel attacked, they will defend themselves. I understand it's a highly emotional and usually irrational arena. What I don't understand is two things: 1) why I am being a big doofus to get involved ever again, even so much as reading it as I well know there's no dealing with cultists and being able to hold a sane conversation with any of these individuals - rather makes me insane, too. Right? 2) if it's illegal (at least I think it is) for an ex-employer to bash an ex-employee publicly (i.e. saying things like "she was too lazy and didn't try hard enough" wouldn't fly. At least I'm pretty sure it wouldn't. Here's one of the digs that's just making me boil: "Maybe if you spent more time working than playing with toys you might be able to make something out of your business. It is a job, you do actually have to work. I've been in the business for 1 year now and I've already been on stage, recruited a few people, and had plenty of bookings and commissions - just get off your butt," Isn't it amazing how people assume how much someone else works or doesn't work? That they *think* they have insider information into someone else's life so they think they have the right to put them down - anywhere, but particularly online for the world to see. To me, a lot of incendiary words were used in that remark above. If someone at my day job spoke to another employee, a customer, or anyone like that, we'd be immediately talked to and given more training at a minimum. We are not allowed to be so disrespectful. If we said something like that on line, I'd be lucky to have a job left - most likely I'd be written up with a stern warning. I wonder, am I just being sensitive, maybe ultra-sensitive, or would you find a comment like that insulting and ignorant, too? This wasn't the only thing to get my goat in the past couple days, although this was the main one. On one of my writer's loops, the discussion grew political. I don't have a political bone in my body and doubt I ever will. It bores me. A discussion unfortunately, turned political on this loop, so rightfully, according to the loop's stated guidelines, the moderator stepped in and asked nicely for the loop members to refrain from continuing the discussion. Unfortunately, people are still discussing the taboo subject anyway. Normally, I wouldn't give it a second thought. I'm just already on a mad, so I noticed. To top it off, I mentioned something completely different to my hubby when he got home from work. He didn't like it, and so he went mounted a defensive. Enough already! Sheesh! I asked him to drop it and I even put in my ear plugs. He kept talking and glared at me when I wasn't responding. I wonder if it would have worked better (probably worse, though) if I wore an ear protector like the one above that also says, "Bullshit Protector". You know, thinking about it, I know what's really wrong with me. I ran out of my Lexapro and Wellbrutin a couple weeks ago. I have to wait until payday tomorrow to renew them. So let me lie low for a few days until the meds have had time to get back into my system and put me back on track. Meanwhile, I'll keep my ear plugs in and avoid that site that's infuriating me. Also, please help me wish my DD#2 a very happy 18th birthday today. I can't believe my baby girl is all grown up. This is her last year of high school and she could move out after this year if she wants. College, probably although she's still undecided. (See a recent post about this). You'll also want to see what Amarinda Jones, Anika Hamilton, Anny Cook, Barbara Huffert, Brynn Paulin, Bronwyn Green, Dakota Rebel, Kelly Kirch, Molly Daniels, Sandra Cox, Regina Carlysle, and Cindy Spencer Pape are up to, so make sure to visit them also. :)

Death By Blogging???

Death By Blogging. It sounds like the title of a cozy mystery novel. Maybe I'll even use it. (I have dibs if not already taken.) But this is for real. This isn't a mystery novel and it isn't a joke. According to the New York Times, not just any fly by night news agency, bloggers are falling dead of heart attacks with no other apparent cause of death. Here's a snippet of what the article says, "

They work long hours, often to exhaustion...Two weeks ago in North Lauderdale, Fla. blogger on technology subjects who died at 60 of a heart attack and in December, another blogger died at 50 of a massive coronary. A third blogger survived a heart attack in December..."

They acknowledge that this is not exactly an epidemic, but is of concern. They also attribute blogging to high stress, weight loss and weight gain, and other ailments. I mentioned this to daughter #2 just now and she was like "Ohmigod, Mom, you've got to get off the computer. You're too stressed out. Take me to the batting cages instead of Borders..." (Where I was going to work on books). Unless there's an energy vampire sucking the life out of bloggers through the net, then I presume that it's overwork in general or perhaps close proximity with the computer for too long, that's the real culprit. This is far different from the post about dreams I had intended to post. I'll leave that for tomorrow or tack that on later tonight. What do y'all think? Do you stress yourself out blogging? Or working in general? Are we putting ourselves at risk? I also have another question. It seems that gay romance is the big seller right now, that it winds up in the #1 and #2 spots on my publishers' top ten bestseller list. My daughter #2 says that's mainly what she finds in the mangas and fanfic, that she has to search hard to find an old-fashioned man-woman romance. Soooooo, do we all start writing gay romance if we want to sell a lot of books? Do we follow the market? Do the majority of readers really crave this type of romance???